pages: 241
isbn: 9781501145858
read: 5/3-9/2017
rating: woah. hated everyone in it (the 2 main characters), liked it, LOVED it. what in the hell. overall, pretty good!
SYNOPSIS
In this moving and enormously entertaining debut novel, longtime romantic partners Kathryn and Chris experiment with an open relationship and reconsider everything they thought they knew about love.
After nine years together, Kathryn and Chris have the sort of relationship most would envy. They speak in the shorthand they have invented, complete one another’s sentences, and help each other through every daily and existential dilemma. But, as content as they are together, an enduring loneliness continues to haunt the dark corners of their relationship. When Chris tells Kathryn about his feelings for Emily, a vivacious young woman he sees often at the Laundromat, Kathryn encourages her boyfriend to pursue this other woman—certain that her bond with Chris is strong enough to weather a little side dalliance.
MY THOUGHTS
woah!
okay, so, this book is about Chris & Kathryn...and their 9 year relationship...and the thought of making it a polyamorous one. (although, i kinda think it already was.)
it was a bit hard to get into this book not because i didn't like the writing but because of the pace. once i dove deeper, i liked it. i hated the characters, Chris & Kathryn, but then i found myself loving the twist it took in the middle and found myself having love for Kathryn, to loving what happened in their relationship to feeling all WTF! THIS is how the book ends!!!?
overall, it was a good book and i feel it might have broken the 'wtf is up with all these books that aren't doing it for me' spell.
SPOILER-ish
i think this might be a bit of a spoiler buuuuut its a baby one so bear with me;
i hated Chris because he is the one that introduced the idea of Emily into his relationship. (NOT polyamory but Emily.)
i hated it because as you read, you learn that this dude, while he doesn't sleep around, he attaches himself to women who bring out a certain something in him. first it was this girl he liked, then he attaches himself to her best friend, then he goes to college and attaches to idk who...then it continues until he meets Kathryn and he stays with her for 9 freaking years.
then one random ass day, he sees Emily at the laundromat and on a camping trip with Kathryn, he can't let the idea of her go.
SPOILER-ish OVER
i myself have never been in that type of relationship and i know, never say never, but i can honestly say that i can NEVER see myself in that kind of relationship. simply for the fact that no matter how you try to break it down, someone will ALWAYS get hurt.
someone will always love someone else more and that said someone will pay attention to someone else more causing the first person to hurt.
that's merely my thought but if you can get behind it and actually carry out that kind of relationship, then more power to you.
i think Zoey did a good job exploring that.
i think as much as Kathryn wanted to be okay with it and as much as she was all for it, it hurt. a lot. you don't do some of the shit she did if you we're really okay with it.
but then to add an element of surprise, i believe Kathryn's upbringing is what caused her to think the way she did.
you can't "own" people.
and then i think about the other couple in the story that breaks away and i think "is she not okay with it because she's exclusively not a part of it?"
with the other couple, it seems that it was Kathryn that was in another relationship, within her relationship and she was okay with it then and missed it when it was gone.
and Chris was just happy going along.
i just loved that Kathryn kind of got her own self back in the end.
and that Chris realizes that maybe he had what he wanted all along.
but the ending!
it just, ends.
for the sake of saving spoilers on here i won't say anything but i feel like while you kinda get the gist of it, it could have ended better, more....conclusive.
it's just in the air (for me anyway) and personally, I'd like to think that Chris doesn't get shit in the end.
buuuut, it could likely be that they just stay in the rhythm that they are in (where it doesn't seem like he still wins) and it just ends in a big....,family but not really kind of way.
i liked that they show resolve for the pain caused. that a "weaker" opponent ends up "winning" in the end.
that it doesn't have a good ending for the dick you want to hate and a good-ish ending for someone you thought didn't have what it took to make it in the end.
overall, for 241 pages, it wasn't a bad read and I'm glad i picked it up.
cover for the win!!!
so far, every time i think about the book, something else shines on me about it and how it's all metaphorical so maybe the ending will come to me later. but so far, not a fan of the abrupt ending but still liked it overall.
I'll leave you with some fave quotes and then, as always, the spoilers!
love isn't: i love you so much that i need to posses you and control you and be the source of all your happiness. Love is: i love you so much that i want you to have everything you need, even when it's hard for me.
- Kathryn pg 66
it's shameful for two people to love each other for so long and then decide to stop.
-Chris pg 82
No one should come home to a bed that looks better off without you.
- Kathryn pg 160
What Chris wants is for Kathryn to be happy. that's what he's always wanted, of course, but now that he's seen what happiness looks like on Kathryn, the sadness of the last nine years terrifies him.
Chris pg 209
I want the opposite of dating, Chris says. I want someone to stay home with on a Friday night and play scrabble in our pajamas. I want to make a giant pot of soup together and then fall asleep with my head on their lap while they read, or their head on my lap.
You had that, Kathryn says. and you wanted something else.
pg 240 (absolute fave!!!!)
thanks for reading!
SPOILERS
Chris meets Emily at the laundromat and goes home and tells Kathryn.
they go on a camping trip and he cant stop thinking about her.
finally Kat tells him to just go out with her to get it over with.
so finally he does.
and they enter a sorta dating agreement. sorta because Emily is basically her own person. she doesn't like to be "tied" down. she's everything that Chris is not and never wants to be.
so finally after a couple of dates, he spends the night at her house and Kat, even though she knew, couldn't handle it.
she just wanders the street all by herself under the rain not looking when she crosses the street (a little bit suicidal from my point of view.) ... this is what i mean by she's not okay with it up above...and she ends up at Em's house, who by the way lives in a kinda like communal space.
(holy shit!!!! i just realized that Em & Kat are kinda the same person but with different moods; depressed/happy at different times in their lives.)
they all spend the night and the next day they have one big happy communal breakfast all of the roommates included.
this goes on for a while and then there's an LA trip that Chris and Emily take to go meet with her family that was supposed to be a 3 day trip. her brother ends up hospitalized and the trip extends. in that period of time, Kat gets ridiculously sick and of course, no one is there to take care of her.
then Moss shows up (she was supposed to show him a dish rack she made) and he takes her to the hospital.
he takes her back to his place (the communal living space) and as the days pass, they i guess grow fond of each other....so they sleep together.
bah!!!
Chris at this point has YET to sleep with Emily but look at Kat getting her grove back.
of course Kat tells him and while he technically can't be jealous, he is a little bit.
long story short, Kat ends up breaking up with Chris for Moss.
and Emily will not commit to Chris.
so he lost everything he had for someone who won't give him what he already had.
I'm sorry but that's his Karma and i LOVED that part! hence why the quote above is my fave!
Kat moves in with Moss, Emily sleeps over Chris' place but can't dream of giving up her space at Ahisma to move in with him.
but he still goes over.
they all still hang out.
so he gets to see Kat happy with someone else and so yea.
it ends with all of them going to a camping trip and Chris skipping rocks with Zach (someones kid).
and that's it.
Kat's upbringing: she grew up with her mother who was in a cult and she was taught that she can't own material things or people and in a very destructive space so she was the happiest when she got tonsillitis and was able to emancipate herself.
it's safe to say that her upbringing scarred her a bit.
The other couple: they had neighbors, Sharon & Kyle, that they would hang out with. Kat & Sharon were best friends who would i think just kiss and hug and hold from time to time...S&K were pregnant but then had a miscarriage and something just fell off of their friendship. their original wedding date got moved to Kat's actual Bday which Sharon did not acknowledge and it just fell off.
there's little talk about some picture at S's wedding where she sees a picture of her and Kat hugging and how she wonders what happened to her but they fall apart. no reconciliation or anything ever happens.
...and i think that's it.
let me know if you have any questions! (:
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