with malice // eileen cook

i really liked the cover. 
...so i had to share it. i could've sworn my nook would've at least shown it in black and white. 
published: 2016  
pages: 236. but truthfully, 229
read from: 11/20-28/2016
rating: 1) didn't care for it 2) liked it 3) LOVED IT

SYNOPSIS (amazon)
Eighteen-year-old Jill Charron's senior trip to Italy was supposed to be the adventure of a lifetime. And then the accident happened. Waking up in a hospital room, her leg in a cast, stitches in her face, and a big blank canvas where the last 6 weeks should be, Jill comes to discover she was involved in a fatal accident in her travels abroad. She was jetted home by her affluent father in order to receive quality care. Care that includes a lawyer. And a press team. Because maybe the accident...wasn't an accident. Wondering not just what happened but what she did, Jill tries to piece together the events of the past six weeks before she loses her thin hold on her once-perfect life.

all in all, it was Simone who was Jill's cyber bully. 
and it was an accident. 
that's the short version. 

Jill wakes up all groggy from a coma or whatever (and honestly, i though it was going to be one of those "we've kidnapped you, we're going to experiment on you not giving a crap if you care" kinda deal) and to spare you the forever of it, she was in a car accident in Italy with her best friend Simone (who is now dead) and she has noooo recollection of it. 

shes freaking out because since she doesn't remember anything shes wondering why Simone hasn't gone to go visit her. 
..well, it's cause she's dead.

shit starts to unravel and everyone thinks that Jill killed Simone over a guy. 

basically what happens is, Jill had this blog where she was all about feminism, and equal rights and all that but she had a bully. someone telling her that she needs to, long story short, stfu.

so they're in Italy (because of a school trip) and Jill hooks up with Nico but Simone can't handle it so she makes a move on him and of course Jill sees and shit hits the fan. 
they fight. 
they sorta make up. 
and then the accident. 

their adviser, trying to make them be on friendly terms, puts them in charge of making the sandwiches for an outing that the class was going to have. 
they're still kind of hostile towards each other and then Simone says something that the blogger bully had previously told Jill and that's when she knew that the troll was actually Simone. 
they argue, Simone makes a move to slap Jill, Jill blocks it but had the knife in her hand so she cuts her and that's when they steal the car to take her to the hospital. 

the whole entire time Simone's being a big ass b basically telling Jill that she's going to black mail her for life, Jill's freaking out, and they drive off a cliff. 

now, this is where i don't know what the meaning of her action was because Jill's panicking that Simone is basically going to own her for the rest of her life but then outta nowhere, she's like "ef that, I'm not letting Simone take this away from me." 
sooo, i don't know if she deliberately drove off the cliff and hoped for "the best" or if it was indeed an accident. I'm going with the former. 

all in all, the Italian authorities try to pursue her to get her in jail but they let her go. 
and by the end of it all, she kind of seems okay with the fact that Simone is dead. 

the funnier part of all this was that it wasn't even her freaking lawyer that found out that her bully was her "best friend" it was actually her freaking roommate who told her to stfu about it because if anyone found out, she'd be dead meat. 


just thoughts on the book itself

i don't want to sound cocky or anything but there is no way in h e double l hockey sticks that this book should have taken me 8 days. 
eaaasily like 2 days. 

i hated Jill. 
from the moment she woke up she was, to me, an annoying little bitch. 
like "hey i was in an accident, but fuck it, ship me to Italy because screw my health its about what i want."

i didn't care for this book. 
i wanted to like it but i finished it and i was like "well, I'm glad that's over with." 
i don't know what it was.

maybe that it jumped from Jill to a person that was talking to the authorities giving their statement. or that the only suspenseful part (for me) was when she finally recalls the fight and everything leading up to the accident but once that chapter was over, i didn't care for it. 
i knew who the hacker was since....πŸ˜”...since Ana decided she'd try to look into it herself. 
you have to have known. 

the whole time Jill is so heart broken and in the end shes like "well, Karma, bitch." 

i don't know. 
i just didn't care for it. 

thanks for reading. 
#lesreads on IG

Gilmore girls // The Festival of the Four Seasons

we are like a day and some odd hours and minutes and seconds away from 4 new episodes of Gilmore Girls!!!!
(take a couple of seconds to catch your breath!) 


i have LOVED this show since day 1. 
i've watched it religiously since it was first released and i've watched it since it ended about once a year. via dvd (single seasons. i didn't like the complete  box set edition) and on Netflix. 

anyway, Netflix, as EVERYONE knows, signed up for a 4 episode 90 minutes each revival. 
i wont get into the details of it because you can look it up (lets be honest, its everywhere.)
BUT i can tell you that their marketing department knows whats up. 

this past weekend (Nov 19/20 2016) they held The Festival of Four Seasons (as well as a freaking screening of the Winter episode with all the stars!!! in Hollywood....but i wont get into that πŸ˜’)  over at UCLA and of course i signed up to go. 
i'm guessing Sunday was the day of winter and fall because those were the only filters i got (i think i got spring as well) and low and behold the weather decided to agree. 
the leafs were falling everywhere and of course while we were waiting, it started to freaking rain. (it never rains in California, so of course, the one day!)

in all honesty, i was thinking this was going to be bigger than it was and it was pretty cool to see the little stands but maybe it wasn't worth freezing over.
i  know on Saturday Gypsy and Lane showed up and maybe others too but Sunday didn't get any love. 
all it was, was little canopies with Stars Hollow spots. 
there was Luke's, Taylor's Soda Shoppe, a post office, Kirks button emporium (1 per visitor but i got 2!!!! team Jess and once a Gilmore, always a Gilmore.) a gazebo, they had a photo booth (that i didn't do because i was by myself and i didn't want to wait), Mrs. Kim's antique shop (which i didn't want to do but im so glad i did) and they had umbrellas hanging from the trees that said In Omnia Paratus from the You Jump, I Jump Jack episode. 

overall, it was pretty cool. the line was extremely long when i got there but i somehow made it into the second group that got in. 
i think if i would have waited longer than i did (almost 3 hrs. lined up at 10ish, event started at 12, first group got in from 1155-1245) i would been a little PO'd. 

but anyway, enough yappin'. 
ill leave you with pictures! 

they handed out fliers with a map on the inside of all the activities taking place inside. 
but also, filters!!! 
once i made it inside, the first thing i did was grab coffee because i was freezing and cold. 
...and i don't like coffee so.....
but also, i finally got my Luke's coffee!!! (under the coffee cover, there's a quote about Lorelai being coffee in a former lifetime)
(not the original one (obvs!) but hey!) 
all of the pictures of props and stuff below were all in Mrs. Kim's antiques. 
i'm so glad i went in there. 
member when Luke & Lor broke up? (lets not talk about it) haha. 
all the yellow is Lor & blue is Luke
Rory and Lorelai's college diplomas.
pictures from different episodes, like her 16th birthday party, doing her homework at her desk and other ones. 

one more day and a couple of more hours. 
i remember setting a countdown on my phone at 90 days and now, we are so close!!!!
i cannot wait!

i'm staying up and i'm binge watching!
and then i'll probably go to sleep, get up, watch it all over again and cry about a thousand more times. 


thanks for reading. 

the sun is also a star // nicola yoon

published: 2016  
pages: 344
read from: 11/13-17/2016
rating: 1) didn't care for it 2) liked it 3) LOVED ITπŸ’žπŸ’•❤

"people say these things to make sense of the world. 
 ...no one want to believe that life is random."
-Natasha (pg 34)

SYNOPSIS (amazon)
Natasha: I’m a girl who believes in science and facts. Not fate. Not destiny. Or dreams that will never come true. I’m definitely not the kind of girl who meets a cute boy on a crowded New York City street and falls in love with him. Not when my family is twelve hours away from being deported to Jamaica. Falling in love with him won’t be my story.

Daniel: I’ve always been the good son, the good student, living up to my parents’ high expectations. Never the poet. Or the dreamer. But when I see her, I forget about all that. Something about Natasha makes me think that fate has something much more extraordinary in store—for both of us.

The Universe: Every moment in our lives has brought us to this single moment. A million futures lie before us. Which one will come true? 

SPOILERS (like 96% of it. so, beware.)

Natasha's family came over to America on a visa and just stayed once it expired. 
they'd been there for about 9 years until her father went and got arrested for a DUI. being on a "i just had my very first gig" high, he told the cop (that he freaking hit) that they were here illegally and well, now they're being deported. 
so on her last day, shes running around like a chicken without it's head trying to talk to someone about doing something to allow them to stay. 

in the middle of going somewhere, she stops and has a "religious" moment which is where Daniel spots her. 

Daniel is going to his Yale interview but because he got in sort of a disagreement with his mother, he leaves early and after the train conductor has a spiritual breakdown and kicks them all out the train he just passes time sitting outside some building (i already forgot 😐) and that's where he sees Natasha. 
he sees what shes wearing as an actual sign from God or the universe that this is where his path is supposed to be.

they end up at a record store where he finally makes contact with her after watching her watch her ex (Daniel didn't know at the moment) make out with the girl he cheated on her with. 

they "part" ways from there because Nat is late to an appointment. 
by this point, he's infatuated with her but he just follows from behind trying to find the way to talk to her. and technically she's walking around the same way he needs to go. (i think. how is my memory this bad!)

and then she's about to cross the street and get hit but he ends up saving her. 

from there, they go back and forth from her trying to get the right people to help her stay in the US (doesn't happen) and he tries to find out whether Yale is what he wants (he doesn't.) 

they end up falling in love and eventually, yes, she does end up getting deported. so all they have is that 1 day. 
that's it. 

in the beginning, Nat is going to a court to get someone to help her appeal their decision. 
Irene is the security guard that i guess you can say sets things in motion. 
had it not been for her taking a long time with Nat's phone case, Natasha would have never broken down, which caused her to basically go off on her case worker, who then in turn gave her the information needed to get her a lawyer that could help her out WHICH leads her to be in Daniel's path. (coming up for air) 

anyway, Irene. 
the day she set this in motion for Natasha, she listens to the nirvana cd (nevermind) after seeing the cover on Nat's phone case and after listening to it, decides that she too will end her life. 
she doesn't.

Natasha eventually realizes what Irene's little delay did so she calls her case worker (i forgot what hes called actually, so I'm calling him that) and leaves him a voicemail asking him to please thank the security guard on her behalf.

that little notification, made Irene decide to live and after another 2 years, becomes a flight attendant where she......

JEREMY JIMMY (or John, or Jacob....i gotta look it up when i get home) 
he's the guy that Nat's case worker referred to her.
he's supposedly the best guy for the case. 

buuuuuuut he fails Natasha because instead of calling his lawyer friend, he ends up going to a hotel with his paralegal assistant (which sucks because hes married with 2 kids, which by the way, end up messed up. but not like haaaardcore. just in the love dept. BUT they do end up together with more kids and while what he did was a shitty, shitty thing (the cheating while married) i mean, you cant fight love now can you!?) 

he also happens to be the guy who is interviewing Daniel for his Yale admission (something about a reference). ANOTHER COINCIDENCE!!!
the dude in charge of a part of Daniels future is the very same guy who ends up ruining it to an extent. 

he also gets hit by a drunk driver. 
connecting anything yet? 
that was the dude that was supposed to have hit Natasha. 
whose daughter was also killed by another drunk driver (I'm not crazy, i know its a fake story and she can make the story have all these connections or none at all but still, you have to love it!!!!!) 

at the end of it all, yes she gets deported and yes they try for a bit. 
they talk and text and email but in the end it all dies out. 
Natasha doesn't want to hold on to the past and so much time passes that she doesn't trust herself that everything she lived through one day with Daniel actually happened the way it did. 
Daniel wants to keep her but he can tell that he's losing her. 
and they eventually just go their own ways. 
time is the enemy of love when you're apart. 

so yes, they lose touch. (at this point, i was crying at the nail shop.) 

back to Irene.

shes on a flight taking notice of people, being the best attendant ever, when she comes across a young Asian man just writing away. 
and a beautiful African American woman who low and behold ends up being Natasha. 
(ahhh!!!! WATER WORKS) 
and Daniel, he's on the freaking plane too. (he was the Asian dude writing.)

the freaking universe took them apart and reunited them in the end. 

and that's how it ends. 
they re-connect on a plane. (but where were they coming from and where were they going to!?)

and in my heart, in my mind and my soul, they end up together after that because they are meant to freaking be!!!!!!!!!!


still left out a loooot tho! ;)

just thoughts on the book itself

i finished this book at the nail salon and i was crying and everything and I'm not even ashamed. 

there's something about Nicola that makes me fall in love with her all around. 
yes, this is only her second book BUT even with this one, there is a voice there that you recognize as hers. 
yes they're YA and they're about love but they are both so different while still having the same voice but they are both just so freaking good!!! (everything everything review)  

maybe its her style of writing. 
i feel like i haven't stumbled upon any other author so similar yet so different. 
you know what I'm talking about? 
(probably not!)

this book. 
i love it. 
i love it with all my heart. 
i loved it SO HARD!

these two could not have been any more different yet perfect for each other even if i tried. 
but they are sooo meant to be!
and what happens but then how it ends!!! my little heart was sad and happy and everything in between!!!

everything that lined up to make it all happen. 
the way she views life. how shes a "realist" vs his view and how he's a lover but how he manages to make her see that there's more than just what she thinks as far as the universe and the timing of it all. 

ahhh! i just want everyone to read this book and fall in cheesy love for the little bit that they read it. 
there's so much i want to say but i don't want to spoil it for anyone down here. 
i just really loved this book. 

I'm a believer in things happening for a certain reason so this book, in that sense, was perfect for me. 
that and karma, 2 things she doesn't believe in. so i really liked Daniel's character. 
(and i love even more that he talks just like i do. he'll start a sentence and then add more into it like i do (just like this). he talks within his talks. i love that! i do it all the time.) 

i love that she names her chapters based on the character that is speaking at the moment. 
and i love that if in said chapter something, or another person is mentioned, sometimes you have a follow up chapter of that thing or person previously mentioned explaining their point.
i love the minor characters here. i feel they play their own part in the book. and had they been removed i don't think the connections could have easily been made.  

there's so many things i want to say about this book but i don't know how to get them out. i feel like I'm not making it justice. 
but then i remember that I'm not here to review the book just talk about how much i freaking love it. 

i loved it so much that i cant even leave you with quotes because i basically tabbed the entire book. (thanks b for my flags!) and to try and do that is to basically type up the whole book for you. 
...buuut let me try. 

"a word can start off meaning one thing and end up meaning another." ....."words, Natasha thinks, should behave more like units of measure. a meter is a meter is a meter. words shouldn't be allowed to change meanings." 
pg 25

"if the person who's meant to love you forever can suddenly stop, then whats there to believe in?" 
-the conductor pg 47

"i don't believe in love." 
- Natasha
"its not a religion.... it exist whether you believe in it or not." 
- Daniel pg 76

"if people who were actually born here had to prove they were worthy enough to live in America, this would be a much less populated country." 
- Natasha pg 112 (and so freaking true. specially after this shitty ass election.) 

"love always changes everything." 
- Jeremy pg 298

there's about a hundred and thirty five million other things that i tabbed that i wont post on here buuut this book gave me all of the loves. 

thanks for reading. 
#lesreads on IG

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