published: 2019
pages: varies
heard: 2/18/2019
rating: no thanks
book: 15-22 in 2019
(also, not that it matters but when its a group of several books like this, i go into my goodreads account and add the additional X amount of books to my "challenge" cause i technically count these all as 1. they're too small to me to eat up 1 book and get me closer to "my goal" . idk I'm weird!)
SYNOPSIS
read all about em here!MY THOUGHTS
SHORT VERSION
WTF!?
LONG VERSION
WTTTFFF!!!???
I don't uh, i don't even know.
once again, amazon reads releases a few short stories and I'm all "okay, let's give it a go!"
these stories are about women and their sexuality and their need to use it to gain some sort of control or power or honestly, i don't even know.
it's been awhile since i heard them and i can still say that i don't care for them and I'm still wtf over a few of them.
I wrote down what each one is basically about but I've decided to leave that all in the spoilers because essentially that's what they are. and i also didn't want to make this an unnecessarily long ass post right upfront.
...let's leave that for books i looooove. or dislike. or i just really have something (a lot) to say on.
i can say that i really didn't care for any of these stories....they didn't do much for me.
BUT Eleanor.
that bitch got me fuuuuucked up.
i just could not get that one 1000 ways to die episode of my head as she was doing what she did.
and just what she did... no...not what im even mentioning on top but that OTHER THING!, like if you want revenge, fine. but don't do what you fucking did. in my head, all i think about is, all the wrongs that could have happened to everyone else because of her actions.
U G H ! ! !
anyway, jump over if you want to know what they're about.
thanks for reading!
#lesreads on IG
SPOILAH'S
CANDACE
LMAO
i'ma die all alone.
Candace goes out to dinner with i forgot his name already.
they're hot and heavy and then the bill comes and he pulls the feminist card on her how it's not fair that he should just assume its okay for him to pay all by himself.
she pulls out a paper detailing all the work that goes into going into a date and bam!
she "wins."
he still takes her home tho.
in regards to this subject:
ahm....well, i would definitely offer to pay but all i will say is: maybe make it clear?
i went on a "date" once and i was asked to pay half which kinda shocked me only because if i would have known i was paying for basically my own plate i would have gotten a lot more just like he did.
dont ask someone to cover when you're the reason the bill is hella high.
and me shaving my legs for a date is my own choice. if he really wants to sleep with you sis, a few hairs won't kill the deal.
LAUREN
YIKES
i always think about the fact that i am suuuuper glad that while I'm not rich I'm definitely not poor by a long shot. and then i read stories about rich ass people who have all sorts of problems and I'm even more grateful.
Lauren opens up a gallery and her mother doesn't show up. she's upset and once home she gets a package that ends up being from her mother and its ends up being 12 fancy af cupcakes.
she throws them on the wall and then ends up binging them.
then, she throws them up and thanks her mother.
her mother basically called her fat and sent her into rehab and know she eats and throws up.
somewhere in there, it's kind of a sexual turn on for her.
the whole, choking yourself thing....which hey! to each their own. but maybe not at the cost that she's doing it.
CLARA
AHHH! TWIST!
i wouldn't say this one was mind blowingly amazing seeing as i still have 3 more to listen to, BUT this one was pretty good. if anything for that plot twist.
essentially, you meet Clara and she's talking to an older man. they go about their day going to dinner and a show.
he's an important man so to say, so he's always walking out on her to take calls.
while at the theater, he walks out on her again. she goes in by herself and gets an email from the creator of the movie that he loves her book.
they meet up and have mind blowing sex.
after all that, they are in the lobby and she's talking to the director when he gets a call, she understands and asks him to take the call.
all the while this is happening, the first older gentleman meets up with her.
he sees her with the director and introduces himself.
turns out the first older gentleman was her father.
and as they hold hands while shaking, she realizes that she just fucked an older man that is exactly like her father.
aahhhh!!!!
and the best part is, one of them asks her if she was coming? (i guess they were leaving. i was checking payroll so i don't remember.) and because i'm immature, i was like, well she just did but i guess she can again. LOOOOOOOOOLLLL
so yea. I'd say that little twist was the saving grace of this story.
and for the record, you don't know that's her father until they all meet so i thought she was some suga' baby.
lesson of the story:
a) don't judge cause you never know.
b) daddy issues are a real thing.
MEREDITH
WTF!!!??
am i listening to this correctly?
are they straight up having sex INSIDE a whole foods!? and no one is saying anything!?
like they are just walking by and grabbing shit off the shelves next to them?
did all she really need was just an amazingly good lay in an aisle inside a whole foods!????
bahhh!
ELEANOR
essentially, Jonathan tells his wife that his (work) position only burdens him because he can sleep with WHOEVER he wants but he can't because she is basically in the way. his own wife is cock blocking him. UGH
WHAT THE FUCK WITH A CARROT!!!!!
also, let's just say Maz hadn't okay'd her advances, that would have been sexual harassment.
(i guess that's a good lesson here with everything going in in Hollywood and shit)
just, there a lot of wrong things with this one!!!!!!
so they go to a friends dinner or idk what the fuck. and prior to that Jonathan had told Eleanor that he wanted to sleep with Ada. so at the dinner, she retires because she feels herself about to cry so she goes to the bathroom and the cook, Maz, walks in on her. she had told him previously that she was allergic to vegetables so he starts asking questions.
she tells him she'll go to the kitchen with him.
they talk.
blah blah blah.....she ends up masturbating herself with a carrot. once she is close to being done, they end up having sex and when he is about to cum (is it come because its less vulgar?), she pushes him and collects his semen and then as he is recollecting himself, goes and puts the semen in the soup pot that her husband and Ada will be eating from.
then they go home and have the best marital sex ever.
.....Jonathan tells her that he doesn't want an open marriage but instead wants a threesome.
she then tells him they already had one. she kisses him and then falls asleep.
WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!!!!!?????????
this one creeped me the fuck out.
that's this ones lesson.
KERIDEE
uhm....nothing really happens with the exception that she's a really hot piece of ass who was done wrong by her boyfriend and so she calls her agent to get a gig and the gig she scores is being the model who hands the race car driver/winner Brad first his helmet then his trophy and in the middle of thunder, grabs her pussy.
and that's it.
im assuming this is an ode to donald dump.
ALICIA
a hedge fund manager is willing to give her 1mil to sleep with her and after going back and forth she says yes.
the day comes but he doesn't show up.
she starts drawing and realizes that its basically a metaphor for women. the wolf is everywhere and women aren't really free. and so she gets upset after realizing that a) she did have feelings for him and b) he wasn't going to show up because he got what he wanted with her just showing up. so she leaves. ( p o w e r ! ! !)
the next day at work, she gets an email from him.
1) charging her $51.88 for the minibar she used and 2) the remaining $9999.00 and whatever change.
and that's it.
HEIDI
lmaooooo
i couldn't tell you wtf is going on if i tried but lol at the fact that one of these fools is thinking about having sex with David Merced which is the guy that's trying to have sex with Alicia in the story above lol
this book taught me that i will 100% not like the audio version of the cursed child.
this one for me sucked. probably the worst of all.
i honestly paid no attention to it and was not interested at all. i didn't even really get what was going on until i read the synopsis and once the whole "writing a porno" scene was done and Heidi was talking to her man who basically showed her the opposite of what she was trying to prove in her porn.
bleh.
and das it.
SPOILAH'S
CANDACE
LMAO
i'ma die all alone.
Candace goes out to dinner with i forgot his name already.
they're hot and heavy and then the bill comes and he pulls the feminist card on her how it's not fair that he should just assume its okay for him to pay all by himself.
she pulls out a paper detailing all the work that goes into going into a date and bam!
she "wins."
he still takes her home tho.
in regards to this subject:
ahm....well, i would definitely offer to pay but all i will say is: maybe make it clear?
i went on a "date" once and i was asked to pay half which kinda shocked me only because if i would have known i was paying for basically my own plate i would have gotten a lot more just like he did.
dont ask someone to cover when you're the reason the bill is hella high.
and me shaving my legs for a date is my own choice. if he really wants to sleep with you sis, a few hairs won't kill the deal.
LAUREN
YIKES
i always think about the fact that i am suuuuper glad that while I'm not rich I'm definitely not poor by a long shot. and then i read stories about rich ass people who have all sorts of problems and I'm even more grateful.
Lauren opens up a gallery and her mother doesn't show up. she's upset and once home she gets a package that ends up being from her mother and its ends up being 12 fancy af cupcakes.
she throws them on the wall and then ends up binging them.
then, she throws them up and thanks her mother.
her mother basically called her fat and sent her into rehab and know she eats and throws up.
somewhere in there, it's kind of a sexual turn on for her.
the whole, choking yourself thing....which hey! to each their own. but maybe not at the cost that she's doing it.
CLARA
AHHH! TWIST!
i wouldn't say this one was mind blowingly amazing seeing as i still have 3 more to listen to, BUT this one was pretty good. if anything for that plot twist.
essentially, you meet Clara and she's talking to an older man. they go about their day going to dinner and a show.
he's an important man so to say, so he's always walking out on her to take calls.
while at the theater, he walks out on her again. she goes in by herself and gets an email from the creator of the movie that he loves her book.
they meet up and have mind blowing sex.
after all that, they are in the lobby and she's talking to the director when he gets a call, she understands and asks him to take the call.
all the while this is happening, the first older gentleman meets up with her.
he sees her with the director and introduces himself.
turns out the first older gentleman was her father.
and as they hold hands while shaking, she realizes that she just fucked an older man that is exactly like her father.
aahhhh!!!!
and the best part is, one of them asks her if she was coming? (i guess they were leaving. i was checking payroll so i don't remember.) and because i'm immature, i was like, well she just did but i guess she can again. LOOOOOOOOOLLLL
so yea. I'd say that little twist was the saving grace of this story.
and for the record, you don't know that's her father until they all meet so i thought she was some suga' baby.
lesson of the story:
a) don't judge cause you never know.
b) daddy issues are a real thing.
MEREDITH
WTF!!!??
am i listening to this correctly?
are they straight up having sex INSIDE a whole foods!? and no one is saying anything!?
like they are just walking by and grabbing shit off the shelves next to them?
did all she really need was just an amazingly good lay in an aisle inside a whole foods!????
bahhh!
ELEANOR
essentially, Jonathan tells his wife that his (work) position only burdens him because he can sleep with WHOEVER he wants but he can't because she is basically in the way. his own wife is cock blocking him. UGH
WHAT THE FUCK WITH A CARROT!!!!!
also, let's just say Maz hadn't okay'd her advances, that would have been sexual harassment.
(i guess that's a good lesson here with everything going in in Hollywood and shit)
just, there a lot of wrong things with this one!!!!!!
so they go to a friends dinner or idk what the fuck. and prior to that Jonathan had told Eleanor that he wanted to sleep with Ada. so at the dinner, she retires because she feels herself about to cry so she goes to the bathroom and the cook, Maz, walks in on her. she had told him previously that she was allergic to vegetables so he starts asking questions.
she tells him she'll go to the kitchen with him.
they talk.
blah blah blah.....she ends up masturbating herself with a carrot. once she is close to being done, they end up having sex and when he is about to cum (is it come because its less vulgar?), she pushes him and collects his semen and then as he is recollecting himself, goes and puts the semen in the soup pot that her husband and Ada will be eating from.
then they go home and have the best marital sex ever.
.....Jonathan tells her that he doesn't want an open marriage but instead wants a threesome.
she then tells him they already had one. she kisses him and then falls asleep.
WHAT THE FUCK!!!!!!!!!?????????
this one creeped me the fuck out.
that's this ones lesson.
KERIDEE
uhm....nothing really happens with the exception that she's a really hot piece of ass who was done wrong by her boyfriend and so she calls her agent to get a gig and the gig she scores is being the model who hands the race car driver/winner Brad first his helmet then his trophy and in the middle of thunder, grabs her pussy.
and that's it.
im assuming this is an ode to donald dump.
ALICIA
a hedge fund manager is willing to give her 1mil to sleep with her and after going back and forth she says yes.
the day comes but he doesn't show up.
she starts drawing and realizes that its basically a metaphor for women. the wolf is everywhere and women aren't really free. and so she gets upset after realizing that a) she did have feelings for him and b) he wasn't going to show up because he got what he wanted with her just showing up. so she leaves. ( p o w e r ! ! !)
the next day at work, she gets an email from him.
1) charging her $51.88 for the minibar she used and 2) the remaining $9999.00 and whatever change.
and that's it.
HEIDI
lmaooooo
i couldn't tell you wtf is going on if i tried but lol at the fact that one of these fools is thinking about having sex with David Merced which is the guy that's trying to have sex with Alicia in the story above lol
this book taught me that i will 100% not like the audio version of the cursed child.
this one for me sucked. probably the worst of all.
i honestly paid no attention to it and was not interested at all. i didn't even really get what was going on until i read the synopsis and once the whole "writing a porno" scene was done and Heidi was talking to her man who basically showed her the opposite of what she was trying to prove in her porn.
bleh.
and das it.
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