"IF I CANT MOVE HEAVEN, THEN I SHALL RAISE HELL"
pages: 313
read: 4/19-20/2020 (but technically like a few hours)
book: 32 in 2020
SYNOPSIS
The bride ‧ The plus one ‧ The best man ‧ The wedding planner ‧ The bridesmaid ‧ The body
On an island off the coast of Ireland, guests gather to celebrate two people joining their lives together as one. The groom: handsome and charming, a rising television star. The bride: smart and ambitious, a magazine publisher. It’s a wedding for a magazine, or for a celebrity: the designer dress, the remote location, the luxe party favors, the boutique whiskey. The cell phone service may be spotty and the waves may be rough, but every detail has been expertly planned and will be expertly executed.
But perfection is for plans, and people are all too human. As the champagne is popped and the festivities begin, resentments and petty jealousies begin to mingle with the reminiscences and well wishes. The groomsmen begin the drinking game from their school days. The bridesmaid not-so-accidentally ruins her dress. The bride’s oldest (male) friend gives an uncomfortably caring toast.
And then someone turns up dead. Who didn’t wish the happy couple well? And perhaps more important, why?
THOUGHTS
FUCK YES!
ooooohhhh this book!
I'm SOO glad I got it as a BOTM pick.
that cover and that synopsis just about did me in. and tbh, had I not woken up at 7 am and then had a fat ass turkey sammich for lunch that put me right to sleep, I wouldve finished this book from beginning to end, all in one sitting...which, technically I did once I picked it back up only 44 pages in at 130am. I finished at like 830am.....I kept getting scared so I I taking breaks. lol.
OMG THIS BOOOOOOK!!!!
Its marked as a thriller but because I'm a huge chicken shit I went into it think it was going to be scary AF which, besides that 1 scene (and it was more just the description of it), it really wasnt scary at all (and to be honest, it doesnt take much to scare me sooo...yah)
I'm suffering from a book hangover because I just opened it up to get the page count and all that and I was instantly bummed out that I was done with it because I loved it that much. I loved this story.
You know someone dies off the bat but you don't know who.
You know someone close obviously did it, but ya don't know who.
and then the deeper you get into the story the more you start seeing the reason why each individual could have been behind the murder.....but i still did not see that end coming.
I guessed that every single person who had more added to their story was the killer but in the end, I did not see that person being the killer at all. i loved it.
The story is told from several points of view and different timelines; the day before, the moments leading up to the wedding, some flashbacks and then as the story is happening and I think that was so well done.
there arent TOO many characters to keep track of (the main ones anyway) and the different timelines are perfect because they arent too far apart and the flashbacks all tie up nicely to everyone's emotions as the story progresses.
...the ending is a little bit open ended but personally that takes nothing away from this story for me.
I think it doesnt bother me because this story is more so about the reasonings behind the why... I don't really want to delve too much into that because I feel like it could be a bit of a spoiler and I'm not trying to spoil that up here.
but if you read it and you're mad because of the ending, all I can say is the story is meant to be about the who and the why. not the after.
anyway, I could seriously go on forever about why I loved this book and then eventually I'd spoil something and I don't wana do that here so I'll just cut it here but so far in 2020, this is my top top favorite read. Quick and fast and good and just the right amount of "scary" for this chicken shit.
jump over for spoilers!
thanks for reading!
SPOILERS
.
The bride ‧ The plus one ‧ The best man ‧ The wedding planner ‧ The bridesmaid ‧ The body
On an island off the coast of Ireland, guests gather to celebrate two people joining their lives together as one. The groom: handsome and charming, a rising television star. The bride: smart and ambitious, a magazine publisher. It’s a wedding for a magazine, or for a celebrity: the designer dress, the remote location, the luxe party favors, the boutique whiskey. The cell phone service may be spotty and the waves may be rough, but every detail has been expertly planned and will be expertly executed.
But perfection is for plans, and people are all too human. As the champagne is popped and the festivities begin, resentments and petty jealousies begin to mingle with the reminiscences and well wishes. The groomsmen begin the drinking game from their school days. The bridesmaid not-so-accidentally ruins her dress. The bride’s oldest (male) friend gives an uncomfortably caring toast.
And then someone turns up dead. Who didn’t wish the happy couple well? And perhaps more important, why?
THOUGHTS
FUCK YES!
ooooohhhh this book!
I'm SOO glad I got it as a BOTM pick.
that cover and that synopsis just about did me in. and tbh, had I not woken up at 7 am and then had a fat ass turkey sammich for lunch that put me right to sleep, I wouldve finished this book from beginning to end, all in one sitting...which, technically I did once I picked it back up only 44 pages in at 130am. I finished at like 830am.....I kept getting scared so I I taking breaks. lol.
OMG THIS BOOOOOOK!!!!
Its marked as a thriller but because I'm a huge chicken shit I went into it think it was going to be scary AF which, besides that 1 scene (and it was more just the description of it), it really wasnt scary at all (and to be honest, it doesnt take much to scare me sooo...yah)
I'm suffering from a book hangover because I just opened it up to get the page count and all that and I was instantly bummed out that I was done with it because I loved it that much. I loved this story.
You know someone dies off the bat but you don't know who.
You know someone close obviously did it, but ya don't know who.
and then the deeper you get into the story the more you start seeing the reason why each individual could have been behind the murder.....but i still did not see that end coming.
I guessed that every single person who had more added to their story was the killer but in the end, I did not see that person being the killer at all. i loved it.
The story is told from several points of view and different timelines; the day before, the moments leading up to the wedding, some flashbacks and then as the story is happening and I think that was so well done.
there arent TOO many characters to keep track of (the main ones anyway) and the different timelines are perfect because they arent too far apart and the flashbacks all tie up nicely to everyone's emotions as the story progresses.
...the ending is a little bit open ended but personally that takes nothing away from this story for me.
I think it doesnt bother me because this story is more so about the reasonings behind the why... I don't really want to delve too much into that because I feel like it could be a bit of a spoiler and I'm not trying to spoil that up here.
but if you read it and you're mad because of the ending, all I can say is the story is meant to be about the who and the why. not the after.
anyway, I could seriously go on forever about why I loved this book and then eventually I'd spoil something and I don't wana do that here so I'll just cut it here but so far in 2020, this is my top top favorite read. Quick and fast and good and just the right amount of "scary" for this chicken shit.
jump over for spoilers!
thanks for reading!
#bookslesreads on IG
SPOILERS
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The short version is:
The person killed: Will. The groom
The killer: Aoife. The wedding planner
The one who gets blamed: Johnno. (stupid ass name) best friend since middle school or some shit.
Now I'll do it by person and tell your their secret or whatever because to try to spoil it step by step like in the book would be too much since it's all over the place....and I still wouldnt do a good job anyway.
A O F I E (and her husband Freddy)
Aofie, along with her husband Freddy own the Folly (the castle thing). She plans the weddings, he caters them.
While everyone has left the island, she has stayed because it's very close to her. She used to go all the time with her family.
she wants to show that the island is not as cursed as everyone claims it is and she knows that hosting Jules & Will's wedding even if at half the cost she could charge will bring her all sorts of media attention.
You later find out that her family is buried in the land not that far from the folly.
J O H N N O
Johnno went to school with Will (whose dad was the headmaster at) along with Femi, Duncan, Pete and Angus.
Johnno was the "dumb" one of the group and Will was untouchable.
During their time in school, there was this "game" called Survival which consisted of getting a kid (a boy since it was an all boys school), blindfolding him and then dumping him out somewhere I'm the forest leaving him there for him to find his way back to the school. Everyone went through it except Will.
There was this kid who they called Loner. He was infatuated with Will bc in his eyes Will could do no wrong. They put this kids through fucking hell. They made him do all sorts of shit and he gladly did it. He just wanted to be a part if the gang.
One day Johnno has him cleaning their room since there was nothing else to do.
While hes cleaning he finds the answers to this super major important test/thingamajig/whatever and this is what breaks him. Will & Johnno come back to the room, Loner tells them he found the test thingamajig and that he going to turn them in or some shit and Will tells him to shut the fuck up.
Will then comes up with the idea to Survival Loner and hypes up Johnno to do it with him.
In the end they get him, Loner doesn't fight them and under Will's instructions they take him to the beach and tie him to the handrail and leave him there overnight.
Loner passes away. The tide came and he drowned.
Fast forward to adulthood.
Johnno came up with the idea to do a survival mode type of show and he and Will tried out for it.
Johnno didnt make it and Will blew up.
We learn that since the accident, Johnno's accident has been eating at him and he thought getting this show would finally let him breathe
He doesn't get it.
He learns at the wedding that he actually did get it the show. Buuuut Will fucked him over and told him that they didnt want him. Will and his publicist or whatever the fuck forged an email and took the chance away from Johnno.
When it comes to the toast Johnno talks about the reason why he left his suit at home (that's another story), pretends to be drunk as fuck and then suggests that for old times sake, they survival Will since he never got to truly experience it. They take him to some secluded cave, leave him there, the guys leave, Johnno breaks off because hes guna go pee turns around and goes back to confront him about everything. If Aofie hadn't gone in when she did, who knows WHAT Johnno might have done.
H A N N A H ( the plus one) & her husband C H A R L I E
Charlie and Jules are the best of friends basically but Hannah has never felt welcomed by Julia and she suspects that they might have had a fling together when they were young.
Hannah ends up bonding with Olivia and eventually pieces together her secret (but I'll leave that for Olivia).
Hannah's story is that she had a sister, Alice, who committed suicide because the dude she was hooking up with but then dumped because he became to possessive, released a video of her going down on him as revenge.
This trip is for her and Charlie to reconnect and spend time together but then Charlie ends up being a dick the entire time.
During the wedding she learns that Charlie did sleep with Jules. Not when they were young but actually a bit after she had given birth to their son.
She's fucking pissed off, tells him off leaves him there, walks away and ends up dancing with some dude Luis.
Shes remembering how good it was to let loose and have fun but eventually feels guilty because she cant act out just bc of Charlie. She tells Luis shes going to get a drink but he goes with her. There Luis runs into another friend and they stay talking. She makes small talk asking how he knows Will and if it's from prep school or whatever tf it's called but he tells her no, that they met in Uni. The guys keep talking and she ends up hearing something that rocks her world. She leaves the tent and ends up puking. (I'll tell you at the end what it is)
Charlie's only other secret and its not even that bad considering what he did (but i still liked that they included it) was that he went to the bachlor party even though hes not a fan of Wills.
The BP was just camping buuuut they survival'd his ass. They canoed out to some small islands and then dared him to swim butt naked from one to the other. He did. When he came back, they left his ass in the middle of the lake or whatever the fuck without clothes or his canoe. I should also mention that when all this was going down, he was high as fuck on shrooms (i don't member if he knew about them or if they pressured him to eat them). When they finally went back for him, he was rolled up into a little ball on one of the islands, crying his guts out.
He didnt speak to them the rest of the trip.
Before its revealed about what went down in the stag, it was made to seem like it was something super dark and while what they did wasn't okay it wasnt as bad as i was expecting it to be. And I guess because everyone elses reasons are more deep, I kinda like that this was thrown in there.
O L I V I A
Olivia is falling apart and you don't really know why. You then learn that she was dumped by her bf whom she thought she was in love with. And then you find out that she had an abortion. And I know that's not something to take lightly at all but because of the way she was acting i was like "really?" but it turns out there's a lot more to that story.
She was staying in Jules' flat while she was away for work.
O decided to make a tinder for the sake of description and there she met a dude named Steven.
She told him she was 24 (she's 17) and they agreed to meet up for drinks. They end up having sexual relations. She ends up inviting him to some launch party shit that Jules was having for her company and she falls ill so she leaves he doesnt get in the cab with her and let's her leave solo. she knows it's over.
She realizes that she is late on her period, gets tested, find out she's pregnant, tries contacting him to no avail so she ends up having an abortion.
J U L E S
she ends up overhearing Olivia's story so shes pissed about that.
And she was having doubts about marrying him but still goes through with it.
In the end you learn that:
1) Will was actually Steven.
She lied about her age. Why didn't she think he'd also be lying?
After he let Olivia go in the cab, he went back inside and that's when he ran into Jules. He knew marrying her would put them both on top. So he was using her. They date a bit and he proposes right away.
Jules finally brings him home to meet her mom and step sister when in he walks and faces Olivia right away. She runs and pukes and hes not phased by it in the end. & he knows hes won. She wont ever say anything. She gets close to it but he knows she wont.
Once everyone is dancing, he pulls olivia in and to forget everything she gets drunk. He ends up taking her out of the tent, they talk, he tells her she won't say shit she says she will and that she has all of their text messages and he gets her phone and throws it into the ocean. As he's telling her off, Jules is looking for them. She overhears. Instead of attacking him there she walks away. When they cut the cake she fucks him uuuuuuuppp. He needs to go to the bathroom to clean up. (I'll come back to this)
(SIDE NOTE: now that I write this did Jules not take him back to her place? And does he not recognize "hey I've fucked someone here before?"!!! but tbh, my geography about the locations might be off)
2. Will is the dude who leaked the video of Hannah's sister. He's the reason she killed herself.
At the bar Luis and the dude start catching up and it leads to them wondering about the "broad" whose video Will leaked and what she was up to.
3. Back to the end of #1.
As Will leaves from the bathroom, the power goes out or some shit and Aofie catches him and asks him to help her with the generator.
They go on the side of the folly and that's when she tells him she knows. She knows that he's the reason her brother is dead. The reason her mother lost who she was and why her father died of the stress. He denies it but she knows.
She tells him that shes been stalking him ever since but it wasnt until his show that she was able to locate him.
He keeps denying it but she tells him that she knows its him because that other kid, Fat Fuck, was in the room and had told her.....and as it turns out, Fat Fuck is actually her husband, Freddie.
She then pulls out the super sharp wedding cake knife and stabs him.
The other guys are out in the dark looking for the body after a waitress let out a blood curling scream.
They find Wills body.
And they run into Johnno covered in blood and with the knife in his hand.
The cops arrest Johnno.
He obviously didnt do it but theres no way to prove that he didnt.
but he accepts it.
It's his payment for killing Loner all those years ago with Will.
The person killed: Will. The groom
The killer: Aoife. The wedding planner
The one who gets blamed: Johnno. (stupid ass name) best friend since middle school or some shit.
Now I'll do it by person and tell your their secret or whatever because to try to spoil it step by step like in the book would be too much since it's all over the place....and I still wouldnt do a good job anyway.
A O F I E (and her husband Freddy)
Aofie, along with her husband Freddy own the Folly (the castle thing). She plans the weddings, he caters them.
While everyone has left the island, she has stayed because it's very close to her. She used to go all the time with her family.
she wants to show that the island is not as cursed as everyone claims it is and she knows that hosting Jules & Will's wedding even if at half the cost she could charge will bring her all sorts of media attention.
You later find out that her family is buried in the land not that far from the folly.
J O H N N O
Johnno went to school with Will (whose dad was the headmaster at) along with Femi, Duncan, Pete and Angus.
Johnno was the "dumb" one of the group and Will was untouchable.
During their time in school, there was this "game" called Survival which consisted of getting a kid (a boy since it was an all boys school), blindfolding him and then dumping him out somewhere I'm the forest leaving him there for him to find his way back to the school. Everyone went through it except Will.
There was this kid who they called Loner. He was infatuated with Will bc in his eyes Will could do no wrong. They put this kids through fucking hell. They made him do all sorts of shit and he gladly did it. He just wanted to be a part if the gang.
One day Johnno has him cleaning their room since there was nothing else to do.
While hes cleaning he finds the answers to this super major important test/thingamajig/whatever and this is what breaks him. Will & Johnno come back to the room, Loner tells them he found the test thingamajig and that he going to turn them in or some shit and Will tells him to shut the fuck up.
Will then comes up with the idea to Survival Loner and hypes up Johnno to do it with him.
In the end they get him, Loner doesn't fight them and under Will's instructions they take him to the beach and tie him to the handrail and leave him there overnight.
Loner passes away. The tide came and he drowned.
Fast forward to adulthood.
Johnno came up with the idea to do a survival mode type of show and he and Will tried out for it.
Johnno didnt make it and Will blew up.
We learn that since the accident, Johnno's accident has been eating at him and he thought getting this show would finally let him breathe
He doesn't get it.
He learns at the wedding that he actually did get it the show. Buuuut Will fucked him over and told him that they didnt want him. Will and his publicist or whatever the fuck forged an email and took the chance away from Johnno.
When it comes to the toast Johnno talks about the reason why he left his suit at home (that's another story), pretends to be drunk as fuck and then suggests that for old times sake, they survival Will since he never got to truly experience it. They take him to some secluded cave, leave him there, the guys leave, Johnno breaks off because hes guna go pee turns around and goes back to confront him about everything. If Aofie hadn't gone in when she did, who knows WHAT Johnno might have done.
H A N N A H ( the plus one) & her husband C H A R L I E
Charlie and Jules are the best of friends basically but Hannah has never felt welcomed by Julia and she suspects that they might have had a fling together when they were young.
Hannah ends up bonding with Olivia and eventually pieces together her secret (but I'll leave that for Olivia).
Hannah's story is that she had a sister, Alice, who committed suicide because the dude she was hooking up with but then dumped because he became to possessive, released a video of her going down on him as revenge.
This trip is for her and Charlie to reconnect and spend time together but then Charlie ends up being a dick the entire time.
During the wedding she learns that Charlie did sleep with Jules. Not when they were young but actually a bit after she had given birth to their son.
She's fucking pissed off, tells him off leaves him there, walks away and ends up dancing with some dude Luis.
Shes remembering how good it was to let loose and have fun but eventually feels guilty because she cant act out just bc of Charlie. She tells Luis shes going to get a drink but he goes with her. There Luis runs into another friend and they stay talking. She makes small talk asking how he knows Will and if it's from prep school or whatever tf it's called but he tells her no, that they met in Uni. The guys keep talking and she ends up hearing something that rocks her world. She leaves the tent and ends up puking. (I'll tell you at the end what it is)
Charlie's only other secret and its not even that bad considering what he did (but i still liked that they included it) was that he went to the bachlor party even though hes not a fan of Wills.
The BP was just camping buuuut they survival'd his ass. They canoed out to some small islands and then dared him to swim butt naked from one to the other. He did. When he came back, they left his ass in the middle of the lake or whatever the fuck without clothes or his canoe. I should also mention that when all this was going down, he was high as fuck on shrooms (i don't member if he knew about them or if they pressured him to eat them). When they finally went back for him, he was rolled up into a little ball on one of the islands, crying his guts out.
He didnt speak to them the rest of the trip.
Before its revealed about what went down in the stag, it was made to seem like it was something super dark and while what they did wasn't okay it wasnt as bad as i was expecting it to be. And I guess because everyone elses reasons are more deep, I kinda like that this was thrown in there.
O L I V I A
Olivia is falling apart and you don't really know why. You then learn that she was dumped by her bf whom she thought she was in love with. And then you find out that she had an abortion. And I know that's not something to take lightly at all but because of the way she was acting i was like "really?" but it turns out there's a lot more to that story.
She was staying in Jules' flat while she was away for work.
O decided to make a tinder for the sake of description and there she met a dude named Steven.
She told him she was 24 (she's 17) and they agreed to meet up for drinks. They end up having sexual relations. She ends up inviting him to some launch party shit that Jules was having for her company and she falls ill so she leaves he doesnt get in the cab with her and let's her leave solo. she knows it's over.
She realizes that she is late on her period, gets tested, find out she's pregnant, tries contacting him to no avail so she ends up having an abortion.
J U L E S
she ends up overhearing Olivia's story so shes pissed about that.
And she was having doubts about marrying him but still goes through with it.
In the end you learn that:
1) Will was actually Steven.
She lied about her age. Why didn't she think he'd also be lying?
After he let Olivia go in the cab, he went back inside and that's when he ran into Jules. He knew marrying her would put them both on top. So he was using her. They date a bit and he proposes right away.
Jules finally brings him home to meet her mom and step sister when in he walks and faces Olivia right away. She runs and pukes and hes not phased by it in the end. & he knows hes won. She wont ever say anything. She gets close to it but he knows she wont.
Once everyone is dancing, he pulls olivia in and to forget everything she gets drunk. He ends up taking her out of the tent, they talk, he tells her she won't say shit she says she will and that she has all of their text messages and he gets her phone and throws it into the ocean. As he's telling her off, Jules is looking for them. She overhears. Instead of attacking him there she walks away. When they cut the cake she fucks him uuuuuuuppp. He needs to go to the bathroom to clean up. (I'll come back to this)
(SIDE NOTE: now that I write this did Jules not take him back to her place? And does he not recognize "hey I've fucked someone here before?"!!! but tbh, my geography about the locations might be off)
2. Will is the dude who leaked the video of Hannah's sister. He's the reason she killed herself.
At the bar Luis and the dude start catching up and it leads to them wondering about the "broad" whose video Will leaked and what she was up to.
3. Back to the end of #1.
As Will leaves from the bathroom, the power goes out or some shit and Aofie catches him and asks him to help her with the generator.
They go on the side of the folly and that's when she tells him she knows. She knows that he's the reason her brother is dead. The reason her mother lost who she was and why her father died of the stress. He denies it but she knows.
She tells him that shes been stalking him ever since but it wasnt until his show that she was able to locate him.
He keeps denying it but she tells him that she knows its him because that other kid, Fat Fuck, was in the room and had told her.....and as it turns out, Fat Fuck is actually her husband, Freddie.
She then pulls out the super sharp wedding cake knife and stabs him.
The other guys are out in the dark looking for the body after a waitress let out a blood curling scream.
They find Wills body.
And they run into Johnno covered in blood and with the knife in his hand.
The cops arrest Johnno.
He obviously didnt do it but theres no way to prove that he didnt.
but he accepts it.
It's his payment for killing Loner all those years ago with Will.
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